Guest Rambler: Managing Expectations

Guest Rambler: An update from the new mom of twins and best friend ever, Brianne.

Managing Expectations

5:36 a.m.

I just got done handwashing 8 tiny little bottles and refilling them. That's a 150 bottles a week. I haven't slept for more than 3 hours at one time in 4 weeks. Kate spit up on me again. I am still wearing the same shirt she spit up on me yesterday. My left arm just might fall off from holding Zack for 2 hours straight. I haven't slept in the same bed with my husband in over a month. And I walked outside yesterday and realized it has been 3 days since the last time. Yet, I have never been happier. Something I NEVER expected.

Is it a question of perspective and managing expectations?

Although I don't get to sleep in the same bed with Wade anymore I do get to sleep on his side of the bed, something I have been wanting to do for years! A number of people have commented on how little I seem to be missing my old life. I wonder if this is because everyone kept telling me how hard two babies would be. Maybe it's because I kept telling myself how hard two babies would be. I was six weeks pregnant when I found out I would be having twins. I cried. I cried more. I didn't sleep for a week. And I let go. Very few people could really know how hard it was going to be. Why listen.

Do we let other people manage our expectations?

When a new movie comes out and your next door neighbor has already seen it 3 times in the theater you think... it must be really good. You go. You liked it but can't imagine why someone would pay to see it 2 more times. If you loved it maybe you thought you wouldn't.

I am relieved that having twins is easier than everyone told me it would be. I am grateful it is easier than I EXPECTED.

Are expectations a good thing?

For the first time in my life am I able to hold on so tight to the moment. I am present. I can't begin to see tomorrow. or the next day. I am too tired. I am happy. I just wrote a post in 15 minutes without any distractions.

I currently live in a space of no expectations.

Thank you Kate and Zack.

the end.