Abadee, Abadee, Abadee That's All Folks...

lovely photo

This week has been full of goodbyes and endings. I feel like I have been drinking a cocktail mixed with every kind of emotion possible - shaken not stirred. I get misty and completely relieved in the same half hour period. Then a shot of fear kicks in followed by a healthy swallow of accomplishment. I'm all over the map. Isn't that what endings are for though? The beautiful, colorful spectrum of raw, authentic emotion. At least it reminds me that I'm alive, no?

So ladies and gentlemen, yesterday was my last official day at The Internship and tonight I finished my last class of graduate school as I know it {curtsy, curtsy}. What a strange feeling it is to never know if I will be an "enrolled student" again. I love being a student so honestly there is some sadness in that goodbye.

I was driving in today thinking about how quickly this experience has passed. (This is when you insert my famous line: Time; what a thief you are. Because he is, damn him.) I think it is important to ritualize beginnings and endings. In my not so humble opinion, I think our culture could do better at ritual. So I try my hardest to personally ritualize significant moments in my life. Like driving in to school for my very last day as a graduate student and the like. I reflect about the people I've meant, and the experiences I have had, and all the many things I've learned, and all the beautiful and tragic stories I've heard, and the change and growth I have seen within myself and others that I have had the good fortune of crossing with and I can't help but be grateful for how space and time has brought me to this experience with these specific people. This includes all my clients (may the universe protect their paths and keep them safe - hugs not drugs), cohort members, professors/supervisors, practicum group members, cohort members turned great friends (you know who you are), and other coworkers.

I like to picture that all of us have a line that represents our life over time, and throughout our lives we get to cross other people's lines. That period of crossing is a gift and all too often passes before I am ready. So in my own ritual I like to honor the crossing. The crossing that solidifies my love forever for people even though our lines may change course and never again intersect the way they once did. Sacred time, my friends. Sacred time.

This week I said goodbye to many crossings and the lines are moving in different directions now. There is grief and joy all mixed together. And I think it is ok to just stay here for a minute and honor it. There will be many more beautiful crossings, I am sure of it. And I plan on getting frustrated at time when those pass too. But for now, I will stay buzzed on my emotional cocktail and remember to drink up this experience because I only get one time to graduate from graduate school.

I made it.