The Wish List

We are finally at that point in the unpacking where I am starting to feel like things have their place and the plastic tubs scattered throughout the house are finding themselves emptied and moved to the garage. There's not much more that could make me happier than empty tubs and things in their place. What can I say? I am easy to please.

House guests always have a way of lighting a fire under your you-know-what too. 

As I was going through an old tub with the hopes that I could just throw all the contents out (my threshold for "stuff" is tiny), I ran across this letter from Shan to my then newly wedded husband.

Included with the card was my wish list:

(it would be amiss not to notice the two cheesy rings that are attached to the top of the lovely floral print)

Isn't my life partner, Shan, the best? Who does that? Finds a list I made years before and sends it to my husband?! I love her for this and many other reasons too but I digress...

Growing up as a Mormon, you can't get through your teenage years without a lesson in church where they have you write a list of the qualities you want in your eternal companion, or known to the regular world as "a husband". If I had it my way those lessons would be shifted to make a list of how you are going to love yourself (flaws and all) and be a complete person before you join forces with another human and make the biggest decision of your life. But until then the eternal companion wish list lesson will continue I suppose {sigh}.

Although my list was made in my early twenties, I think the list is pretty right on with what I was looking for in someone to spend my life with. I remember the timing of this because I had spent too many years loving someone that did not meet the first requirement and I allowed myself to feel diminished and unappreciated by the experience. Not cool. And I knew that was not what it is supposed to feel like. Hence wish numero uno.

The second pipedream is pretty self explanatory. I believe that healthy modeling proved to me that being with an emotionally healthy person was key to a successful relationship. Plus, I didn't want to lose myself in this thing called love. I wanted to be enhanced. A powerboost so to speak - like in MarioKart. When awarded it makes you better and faster.

Those weren't too much to ask for, right?

I don't think love requires of long laundry list of must-haves. I was surprised with how easily, natural, and timely the events and feelings felt leading up to, during, and while falling in love with Scott. Sizzle wrote a post today that got me thinking about it too. I remember the calculations and the over-analyzing and all that energy that went into the guessing game. Until one day, you just look at the other person and know that you love them. In places in your heart you didn't know existed or that you thought were locked and boarded up and too dark, sad, and neglected to try and open.

And there were no games or calculating even involved in the reopening.

Fancy that.

So I choose to hold hope that there's a lot of love out there to be had. And that many - dare I say most all of my friends with find it. Sizzle will find Her Person. K will find her EC. B will meet her match. Sin City will find a man to love on her real good for the second half of her life to make up for lost time. Jensen will find an intelligent lady to keep up with his banter til the end of his days. And with some time and a deep breath Dull Scissors will once again be in the arms of his lovely A.

I am the hope holder.

Maybe I will quit my day jobs.